


Kismet

by TheBansheeQueen



Series: A Suramar Story [4]
Category: World of Warcraft
Genre: Break Up, Death, F/M, Getting Back Together, Implied/Referenced Abortion, Loving Marriage, Marriage, Miscarriage, Pre-World of Warcraft, Suramar, nightborne
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-13
Updated: 2019-01-13
Packaged: 2019-10-09 03:57:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17399594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBansheeQueen/pseuds/TheBansheeQueen
Summary: Second poem by Source: https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/i-love-you-by-ella-wheeler-wilcox





	Kismet

“Speak plainly doctor or I will find someone who will”

The hiss in Ervine’s tone was beyond palpable- it made the poor doctor flinch violently and stutter the next few words out- “I meant exactly as I said, Sir.” he looked to Korvos for support, the blond sighed and put his hand on his brother's shoulder,

“You know what he-” he started but was stopped,

“No, I don’t” Ervine hissed “He’s a doctor- he’s meant to resolve issues like this” he turned to the doctor “so _fix_ it”

“I wish I could, Lord Ailelumi. I really do” the doctor sighed “this is a common issue in our society I’m afraid. The nightwell has left ours and our children's bodies fragile- we still haven’t found a way to resolve an issue that seems to be embedded into our kind”

Ervine’s jaw tenses “So what happens now” he looked over to Hae’lynn who was passed out on the infirmary bed, her breaths labored- her hands settled on the swell in her stomach. Her baby- _their_ baby. It was going to well, they were being so careful- doing everything in their power to keep both her and their would be child healthy. Still, it wasn’t enough- it never was. Her health started dropping a few days ago, soon after falling into a sleep she couldn't seem to wake up from...now here Ervine was. Alone and awake, forced to make a decision,

“Both of them cannot survive” the doctor gestured to Hae’lynn and the swell in her stomach. “The birth _will_ kill her, but we should be able to keep your child alive…” he paused “...or…”

“Or?” Ervine didn’t need to ask, he knew what was going to be said,

“We remove the child- Hae’lynn should be able to then recover her strength. Maybe a few years down the line you can even try again”

The tall man looked at his wife, then at her stomach, then back again. He pushed a few strands of loose hair away from her face- “Do it.” he spoke firmly, “Get rid of the child”

Korvos frowned “Brother,” his voice was careful, the emotion in it palpable “you are being offered a difficult decision but think about what Hae’lynn would-”

“I don’t care.”  The comment made Korvos stop. “I’m the one who will live with the aftermath- I’m making the choice. My decision stands.”

The doctor nodded, “Very well. We’ll begin immediately”

 

* * *

 

 

Hae'lynn was beyond distraught when she awoke. When Ervine had tried to explain what had happened to his great surprise she has shunted him away from her as hard as she could and just wept into her knees. He didn't understand- he'd saved her life. Of course, he hadn't made a choice out of spite- so why was she angry...what did she expect him to do? The fact he didn't know made him frustrated- this frustration only grew in the next few days back at home.

She was angry at him still- so much she refused to look at him. So much so that she had asked Korvos if she could set up in the spare room for a while so she interacted with Ervine as little as possible...and Korvos had _agreed_. When he'd asked Korvos why he was so set on siding with his wife Korvos had just looked at him pointedly, like he had done when Ervine was a child and had misbehaved-

"She needs a moment to be able to breathe, brother" he explained, "She's upset, she feels betrayed. She wants a moment to herself to get her emotions in check so she doesn't collapse on you."

"I don't understand why she is angry with me. Did she think I did this to spite her?"

"In part; yes." Korvos explained "you saw from the last pregnancy, she's self-conscious about her inability to have a child. She thinks you have denied her the chance to grow as a person. To be happy with herself"

"That is illogical. She wouldn't be happy- she'd be dead."

"This is why you've been separated, Ervine" Korvos pet his shoulder "The feelings that come with grief are illogical. That's part of why they're so hard. You don't understand that."

Ervine huffed and looked to the side "Because it's moronic" he grumbled. Korvos sighed,

"You're stressed. She's upset. It's a bad combination. Just leave it, okay?"

He couldn't. His family didn't understand but he hated loose ends of any kind- he couldn't just leave an issue unsolved. He _couldn't._ It made his head hurt. As such, he tried to corner her coming out of her leyweaving room.

"Hae'lynn" he tried to grab her attention but she turned a walked away as fast she could- it was for naught, he easily caught up with her, "Hae'lynn" he repeated, grabbing at her wrist to keep her near him,

"Let go" she spoke, her voice was small and timid. The fact those were the first words she'd said to him in days made him flare in anger,

"No" he tried to keep the hiss out of his tone but found himself failing "not until you talk to me"

"I don't want to talk to you right now."

"then when"

"I don't know-"

"when."

"I don't know" she repeated "perhaps when you're less emotionally suffocated"

He blinked at that for a moment before narrowing his eyes, "what did you expect me to do, Hae'lynn?"

"I don't know. Perhaps think about what I would have wanted?"

"wants don't matter to deadmen- or are you choosing to forget that fact?"

"I've lived.  I've had my chance- my life- everything. Our baby never gets that chance" she shifted her gaze at him, the grief in her eyes prominent "because _you_ choose to take that from them"

"I would have saved you both if I could have."

Hae'lynn finally managed to pull her wrist back, "Well now you've lost us both." she turned to leave- Ervine moved to stop her but a hand on his shoulder halted him, he turned to see Ysreia standing behind him.

"You'll just upset her more if you follow" she huffed slightly "Don't waste your energy on a pointless argument. Wait til she wants to talk"

Ervine relented, sighing deeply "You sound like Korvos"

"I have my moments. Come on, I'll let you beat me at chess a few times so you'll feel better."

 

* * *

 

 

Hae'lynn was missing. She wasn't in her temporary room, or the dining room, or the garden, or her leyweaving room. Originally when Ervine couldn't find her- he'd thought she'd _finally_ decided she was ready to have an adult conversation with him. That'd she returned to their room and he'd find her perched on the bed ready to talk and make up. Then they'd make love for the first time in weeks and be able to bask in the aftermath- forgive each other for what they'd both done to hurt the other- whispering sweet words through the panting of their passions.

That's what Ervine wanted right now, it was what he needed. So when he walked into his empty room, the disappointment he felt was almost drowning. Then the disappointment shifted to panic- then where was she?

The temporary room had been emptied of most of her clothes- it was part of the reason why he assumed she'd come back to their room. However, upon checking he found Moth was missing too...then it dawned on him-

She'd left the estate- she'd left _him._

The agony that pitted in his chest almost knocked him over, but he stayed standing and forced himself to calm. There was only a number of places she could go. Scerlo's home or Nyave's home. That was it. She'd never return to her mother's house willingly and she despised Luru's husband with a passion so she'd never share a house with him. Okay, this was simple. He'd find her, ask her to explain her feelings in a way he'd understand- he'd apologize- she'd come home.  

Then he'd finally get his wife back.

 

* * *

 

 

She wasn't at her sisters homes. Ervine finally understood how they must have felt when Hae'lynn left Jyrela's home to stay with him, their motivation for storming into the house uninvited. Because he'd done the same thing to them, while Scerlo was as wide-eyed and dim as ever Nyave had been honest with him,

"I know how much she loves you" she'd explained once he'd searched the house for any sign of her "I wouldn't try to keep you apart if she was here. However, if she'd left she must be suffering. She's crazy about you- its the only explanation"

"I can't apologise if I can't find her" Ervine stressed too which Nyave shrugged,

"Maybe she doesn't want an apology. Maybe she just needs a reminder you care."

He would have given her that- stars know he would have but he couldn't find her. This was foolish of him. He'd never intended to end up in a relationship- so why was he so distraught about his marriage being over? He could return to study and his life would return to how it was before he got married. He'd be fine.

The fact that whenever he tried to work all he could do was sit at his desk head in hand suggested otherwise. He tried to distract himself- he had paperwork authorizing the upgrade of new defensives Chief Telemancer Oculeth was interested in- whether or not it would actually lead to anything was a different story. He got through a couple of pages before he felt himself getting angsty again. The fact the feeling returned so quickly only annoyed him more, he's never reacted this badly to _anything_ before- was it just the fact it had caught him by surprise?

He didn't know. He huffed. Maybe he was just pent up- yes that must be it. If he touched himself- he'd probably just forget all about the woman once he was finished. He was just craving her because he'd gone for so long without an orgasm. Yes, that made sense. He shifted quickly, moving to push his trousers down just enough to grab himself, as he started to pull on his member he tried to think about anyone or anything but her. His mind refused to obey him; her long white hair tickling his chest as she straddled him, her purple skin connecting and contrasting with his dark blue tone, her lipstick staining his skin as she mewled above him.

It was too much; he needed something more. He desperately fumbled through his desk for something- anything of hers. He found a scarf she'd made him a few months back, he hadn't used it since he enjoyed the cold so it still had her scent on it- perfect.

He held the cloth to his face, finding himself standing and leaning over his desk and he mindlessly thrust into his own hand. It wasn't quite as satisfying as the real thing but it would have to do, he allowed his thoughts to move freely- if only for a moment. He imagined for a minute she wasn’t angry with him, that she hadn’t left him, that she was here beneath him; encouraging him to continue.

His orgasm was so intense it actually kind of hurt, leaving him breathless and shocked as he gasped to regain himself- finding the breath to moan Hae’lynn’s name as he spilled out onto his desk. It took him a few minutes to regain himself, when he did he opened his eyes and groaned at the mess he had made.

He’d spilled himself right onto the paperwork he’d been doing. Now it was in no state to be handed to anyone meaning he’d have to redo it. Worst of all, his actions had done nothing to calm his continuous frustrations- if anything they were only worse. He sighed and looked towards his wine cabinet, well if masturbation couldn't fix his problems, he was sure alcohol could.

 

* * *

 

 

"Ervine?" Korvos called cautiously into the dining room at the sound of cursing and crashing, "Are you okay?"

Ervine grumbled to himself, "No, I dropped my glass"

Korvos frowned at his little brother, making note of the multiple empty wine bottles scattered around the room, "You're going to make yourself sick"

The taller sibling laughed bitterly "That's the idea" he disregarded his broken glass and instead picked up the whole wine bottle and drunk from it contently. Korvos borderline scowled at him,

"That's such a father thing to do. What do you think bringing harm to yourself will accomplish?"

"Fuck off, Korvos" he swayed his glass lazily "I get you've never been in love before- you just people hop- so you don't understand what I'm trying to weather" he took another swig, "I also get you've never had to make a hard choice in your life- just leave it to your betters, you know"

"Excuse you." Korvos tried to keep the hurt out of his voice "I get you're sad but you don't need to take it out on me"

"I'm not sad. I'm in fucking misery" Ervine's jaw tensed "do you understand? I'm in a constant state of pain and there isn't anything I can do to fix it" he laughed again, the sound false and wrong, "but I forgot- Ervine doesn't have feelings. Ervine doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve so how could he _feel_ anything"

"Ervine..."

His eyes snapped to his older brother "That's what you think isn't it? You think I'm some soulless cretin, don't you?"

"Ervine."

_"Don't you."_ he stood, a ripple of magic rolling off of him shattering the mirror and glasses in the room, Korvos held his hands up in surrender,

"Calm down, Ervine"

" _Calm down?!"_ the elf stood and strode over to his elder sibling, "I've lost my baby and my wife and you want me to _calm down?!_ " he stood right over the shorter man, looking down at him. Korvos just looked up to regard him,

"Yes. I want you to calm down and talk to me"

A moment of silence settled before Ervine's lip quivered slightly as he broke down into tears, his knees giving out from under him. Korvos was with him instantly, holding his brother tightly, Ervine clung to him as though he was a child. It worried him; Korvos hadn't seen Ervine cry since he was seven.

"I need her."

"I know."

"I don't know what to do"

"I wish I could help Ervine- but I think you just need to let her breath and forgive you in her own time"

"And if she never forgives me?"

"She will. This is Hae'lynn we're talking about; you risked your life for her, she risked her freedom for you. That kind of bond doesn't break- it just needs time to repair"

Ervine's voice was weaker than he'd ever let anyone else hear, "Do you promise?"

Korvos smiled at him "Of course, baby brother"

 

* * *

 

 

They hadn't spoken about the incident further. Korvos didn't push it- he knew of Ervine's irrational phobia of showing weakness. They tried to conduct themselves like normal even as the days past- today they were at the bazaar. They didn't need anything in particular- Korvos was just desperate to offer Ervine any level of distraction.

"I think a purple-gem hair clasp would suit me. What do you think, brother?" Korvos asked idly, he frowned when he got no reply. "Suramar to Ervine?" he turned to his brother to see him staring at something critically. He followed his gaze; it was Lyndras. This itself wasn't unusual, he was a leyweaver so he brought silk regularly however Ervine looked at him suspiciously,

"Hae'lynn is at Lyndras' home" he stated. Korvos blinked dumbly,

"What makes you say that?"

"He's buying mana-cherries- they're Hae'lynn's favourite"

"That doesn't-"

"He's separated the apples from them- he knows Hae'lynn has a minor allergy to them"

"Ervine-"

"He's also collected manasaber supplies- he doesn't own a manasaber. They're for Moth"

Korvos sighed, "Okay, what do intend to do about- Ervine wait!"

Ervine had already strode towards the man, offering a rehearsed smile at his greeting, "Leyweaver, how nice to run into you" the hiss in his voice was there, he was angry- however, he stayed composed even as Lyndras visibly jumped at his greeting,

"O-oh, Arcanist! What a pleasant surprise!" he shifted nervously as Ervine eyed his brought supplies,

"I was unaware you had a manasaber, my friend"

"W-what?"

"Your supplies. You are buying for a manasbaer, no?"

"O-oh of course. Forgive me, I'm rather scatterbrained today"

"Then please, let me assist you home, you have brought far too much for one man to carry"

"Thank you but-"

"I _insist_ " Ervine held the end of the word making the leyweaver gulp,

"Of course. Thank you"

"Ervine..." Korvos whispered as Ervine took some of Lyndras' supplies "what are you hoping to accomplish here?"

Ervine smiled patronisingly at his sibling, "So critical. I am merely assisting a friend, brother."

They both knew damn well that wasn't what he was doing but Korvos allowed it, following the nervous and twitchy Lyndras back to his home- he opened the door and turned "Thank you for your help but I have much work to do-"

"Lyndras, are you back?"

There she was. Stars help him- his craving for her only seemed to quadruple at the sight of her- and her voice, sweet and melodic. He'd missed it more than words to could ever describe. Her eyes widened at the sight of him and for a split second, he saw the desperate need he felt reflected back at him. She felt the same, there was hope for them. "Hae'lynn." he let the fondness leak into his tone, still she seemed skittish,

"Ervine..." she back up slightly as he moved forward- she was nervous. Korvos saw this and intervened,

"Brother-" he was interrupted as a flick of Ervine's hand sent both him and Lyndras backward out the door, sealing it with an arcane spell behind them. He moved forward-

"Ervine wait, please I..." her words failed as he moved to his knee in front of her,

"I need you more than I need to breath- please talk to me" he knew from the expression on her face she'd expected him to be angry, to yell- tower over her and berate her. The fact that she feared that from him made her chest hurt,

"I..." she sighed "stars...I don't even know where to start"

"start at your feelings, explain them to me so I can understand"

"My feelings?" she huffed "What's to be said? I feel worthless- I feel like you _like_ me feeling worthless"

"I would never-"

"Then why did you do it, Ervine. You know how terrified I am of not being able to provide you children yet you-" she whimpered, stopping herself before she was upset too far, Ervine watched her expression carefully,

"I..." he sighed "and I am terrified of losing you. Perhaps I was selfish- but if we were to have children my only want is that we do it _together._ " he tensed "I put my fears before yours- I beg you forgive me. Please come home"

She paused, she thought a moment before answering "I- I don't think I can. Not yet anyway."

His heart sunk, "why?"

"I've spent my whole life under someone else's thumb. I just need time to prove to myself I'm not the failure I _feel_ I am"

Ervine thought on her reply before slowly standing, "My intention was never to make you feel that way. I love you dearly, Hae'lynn. I would never intentionally hurt you"

"I know" her answer was quick "I just- we're two very different people. It's suffocating sometimes- I feel too much and you..."

"don't feel enough?"

She sighed "I suppose"

"I'll endeavor to fix it, I'll go to a therapist if I have to"

Hae'lynn shook her head, "Don't be silly. You hate therapists."

"I'll deal with it"

She smiled weakly at him, "it's not just you. It's me- I can't ask you to adapt yourself without me doing the same- and I can't do that at home" she sighed "not when I feel like it's me being in love with you and you...tolerating me"

Ervine frowned at her, his hand cupping her cheek before talking "I love you more than life itself- I have killed for you and I would do again" he thought a moment, "I've been complacent- I will prove my devotion to you, Sul'daleur. I swear it" he didn't wait for a reply instead he turned and opened the door walking out. Korvos quickly trailed after him,

"Stars, Ervine" he cursed "Don't do things like that, you half scared me and Lyndras to death"

"I know how to win her back"

"Pardon?"

"We spoke- I now know how to win her back" he smiled to himself, "If you'll excuse me"

 

* * *

 

 

Hae'lynn sighed in her quiet room, it was smaller than her one at home- but more decorated with silks and fabrics. She liked it but she liked Ervine's room more. Their conversation replayed in her mind- Stars she'd wanted to go home with him so badly. But couldn't completely explain why she couldn't go with him. Perhaps she just owed it to herself to be by herself for once in her life- shame she hated being without him. Her musings were interrupted by the sound of a voice;

_The stars, they pale under you_

_My heart shrivels without you_

She blinked as she stood, _Ervine?_

_My life, bleak without your touch_

_My soul, empty without your love_

She moved to the balcony, pushing the door open and seeing him there in the empty garden looking up at her window,

_No pain so unbearable_

_No punishment so cruel_

Was he serious? She sighed and closed the door and went back to brooding on her bed- she expected him to be bored within 20 minutes. 3 hours later he was proving her very wrong.

_I love your lips when they’re wet with wine_

_And red with a wild desire;_

_I love your eyes when the lovelight lies_

_Lit with a passionate fire_

_I love your arms when the warm pale flesh_

_touches mine in a fond embrace;_

_I love your hair when the strands enmesh_

_Your kisses against my face._

She pushed the door open again to see if he truly was still there or if her sanity had finally failed her- no he was still there, his voice becoming hoarse from the constant strain,

_So kiss me sweet with your warm wet mouth,_

_Still fragrant with ruby wine,_

_And say with a fervor born of the South_

_That your body and soul are mine._

_Clasp me close in your warm sweet arms,_

_While the pale stars shine above,_

_And we’ll live our whole young lives away_

_In the joys of a living love._

Stars help her- she was pathetically in love with this man. She walked back- this time leaving the door open. It took only a few moments for him to teleport up and walk in, he let her speak first,

"I'm pathetic" she sighed "I try to prove to myself I have a level of independence- and I betray myself for a few fake honeyed words"

"I meant every word" Ervine corrected "and if you are pathetic for needing me- then I must be pathetic for needing you"

She turned and looked at him fully "I could live a thousand lifetimes and never deserve you."

"That is a lie and you know it" he moved to her, hands pulling her hair from her face and cupping her cheeks, "never have a met a soul so loving, so kind and patient." he kissed her forehead and held his lips there for a moment, "I am a cruel and unempathetic man. You see a side no-one has ever been patient enough to look for- it is _I_ who does not deserve you"

Hae'lynn's words failed her for a good minute before she let out a shuddering breath, her hands curling into Ervine's shirt "Elune help me- I love you so much"

He smiled at her then shifting his mouth to her lips "I love you too"

 

* * *

 

They both panted helplessly in the afterglow of their lovemaking, Ervine's arm curled around her bare waist as he chuckled breathlessly "I think that might be the most intense orgasm I've ever had," he kissed her forehead as she blushed "I hope I didn't hurt you, I think I gripped your waist a bit too tightly"

She smiled at him, kissing his nose in response "No, I'm okay. I- I really needed that"

He practically purred at her "Me too" he laughed again "I dare say my hand is nowhere near as satisfying as that tight peach of yours-"

"Don't call it that" she squealed in embarrassment her cheeks glowing "I- my hand may have seen more use as well..." she blushed further "Stars, Lyndras almost caught me twice- it was so embarrassing..."

Ervine chuckled softly at her "If it makes you feel any better I may have made a mess of my paperwork while deep in thoughts of you"

She giggled "We're so awful"

Ervine hummed in agreement "That's why we belong together"

She smiled at him before yawning, "I'd sleep but I just want to keep staring at you"

"And I you" he confessed as he gripped her a little tighter, "I've missed you- our room was hollow without you"

She shifted closer to him, resting her head on his shoulder "I won't leave again" she decided after a minute, he sighed quietly with relief,

"Thank you" he meant it, he felt Hae'lynn's grip on him tighten,

"Take me again. Please?" she looked at him shyly, "I miss the feeling of you already"

Ervine moved his mouth to hers, kissing her desperately before breaking away to reply "Of course. Anything you need...Wife"

She smiled "Thank you, husband”

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Second poem by Source: https://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/i-love-you-by-ella-wheeler-wilcox


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